Angels Among Us

There are times when things really get tough and you really really got a bad day because somebody had hurt you in the most impolite manner. You heard a very bad news that your heart breaks like you can’t put it back to work again. There are times when the hurt that occurs in our lives is almost unbearable. You are tormented. You almost can’t trust anybody ever again. You want to stop what you love to do…

But angels really exist. They came in times you need them most. They are people. Good people that God send during the lowest times of your life. An angel who always pat you at the back and say boy you can get through it.

God Is Here

THE MOST AUDACIOUS enlivening, freeing, joy-creating, humbling, life-transforming reality of the Christian faith is not that God will be with us, but that God is here, right now. God is here in the midst of suffering, in the midst of short-coming, in the midst of triumph, in the midst of our greatest fulfillment, and in the midst of our broken-heartedness.

- Gregory S. Clapper
When the World Breaks Your Heart

I haven’t read the book, but I can easily relate what I am going through to what the author is trying say. I have experienced every single emotions enumerated above, but one thing is for sure, God is always here. He never left me and I know He does the same way to all His children. As He is with my lovely angel, God is also here with us.

You’re Still an Inspiration

Lately, I’m in a state of bliss because of what’s happening about my work. They appeared on local, national and even international news. At this very moment.. maybe I’ am the saddest person in this planet. But, I sure know that my precious one is the happiest angel in heaven. Everything I do is for you Anne Sherina. You’re always an inspiration anak.

God Will Make A Way

Somehow it’s needless to say any words along with this song when you are really down and out. Oh how I missed you my little one.

God will make a way,
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way, He will make a way.

By a roadway in the wilderness, He’ll lead me
And rivers in the desert will I see
Heaven and earth will fade
But His Word will still remain
He will do something new today.

God will make a way,
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way, He will make a way

The Hurt is Almost Unbearable

Most of the times when I think about my little baby I’m into tears. The hardest thing is when you are on your bed and she suddenly seeps in your heart and soul and you can’t help but cry. I know God knows how I feel, how Anabelle and Brennan feels. And I know that He got the answer for all of the uncertainties that we are feeling day to day. How I missed her.. nobody can explain.

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Missing You So Much Every Single Day

As it goes longer, the longing grows deeper. It’s seeping deep inside my soul like it never ends. How someone you loved so dearly just left like that. I guess it’s just because I love you so much that is why I’m feeling this way.

Anne,

I hope to see you again one day my sweet little one. I love you so much!

Love,

Papa

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Living with the Pain

Just about every single day when you try to do something for your own survival; like eating, drinking water, taking a bath and just about anything; you will be missing that special part of your being that has gone ahead of you. The pain is almost unbearable.

Tears Wont Dry

I’m still in a very deep shock about the loss of my precious child, my little one. If only I could go where she is right now I’d really want to. I felt so sad that she’s not going to share with us the future. Maybe God have already shown her completely what she have to see in this mortal stretch of time.

But I really miss her so much. I can’t top my tears from falling every time I think of her. Of how I will face the future without her. I’m missing you so much Anne.

Drawing Courage and Strenght from God

“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you [God] are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me” (Psalm 23:4)

I know this isn’t easy though we’re Christians. Sometime I’m just trying to think that it is just a bad dream and I can wake up one morning that my child is well. Sometime I’m feeling so hopeless and weak that it is almost senseless to move on. But at times I can clearly sense that God and my little one are just breath away from me and that in God’s might and power a decade would seem to be an hour and a thousand year be like a day and that the day that my daughter and me will be together again will be in no time. I know that God will draw me near from where they are. That God wants me to be with Him.. to be with my Anne Sherina.

A Future is Lost

A lot of people specially her teachers at school are saying that Anne Sherina is exceptionally intelligent, well mannered, loving and kind. I’m drowning in tears when I see her handwriting which is far more better than a regular fourth year high school student. She really is a lost future. Sometimes I can’t stop my self from thinking of what she might have been when she’s grown up. With her intelligence and great interest for studying, she might have gone far. Her lola (grand mother) said she always find her apo (grandchild) doing her homework everytime she comes to visit Anne Sherina and her brother.

What an emptiness the loss of Anne Sherina had brought into my life. Words can’t explain how I feel. Temporarily few things can make me smile but the thoughts of my precious child always brings longing and loneliness for the reality that she is separated from us until the day our souls reunites again.