When I’m sad she comes to me with a thousand smile… it’s alright, it’s alright she says…
I heard that line from a song from a mainstream band. I don’t know to whom it was written for, but I can relate to the song what I’m going through right now.
It seems that those words came from my little angel for me when I’m sad.
When I’m alone I love closing my eyes coz I can see her smile.
I know that she is watching from above and she knows so well when I need her for courage and strength. She’s always there to say it’s alright Papa, things will be just fine.
“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you [God] are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me” (Psalm 23:4)
I know this isn’t easy though we’re Christians. Sometime I’m just trying to think that it is just a bad dream and I can wake up one morning that my child is well. Sometime I’m feeling so hopeless and weak that it is almost senseless to move on. But at times I can clearly sense that God and my little one are just breath away from me and that in God’s might and power a decade would seem to be an hour and a thousand year be like a day and that the day that my daughter and me will be together again will be in no time. I know that God will draw me near from where they are. That God wants me to be with Him.. to be with my Anne Sherina.
How I wish to have another day to show you how much I love you. How I wish for another minute to hug and kiss you. I’m missing you so much honey. I missed the way you play with my nose and ears until I got so irritated. I missed the way I pinch your cute little nose while saying it’s cute how I wish it has grown a bit. I kept on comparing you with little girls your age and I can’t find anyone who got hairs as lovely as yours. I can’t help but melt when I see that lifeless lovely face rest upon your love hair. I can’t help but cry to see my flesh and blood, pride and joy and hopes and dreams gone too soon (forever). Help me my child to find the courage and strength to face tomorrow. Though you might not be around a moment more you will be my light to guide me through this short but uncertain journey you left me in. Day by day I will be glad to tell you what I have already gone through. What I’m in right now is just like another walk in the park and didn’t catch the bus way home. I know it’s only God, you and me who knows the pain I’m going through living without you. Anne Sherina, my child, because of you everything became easier to bear. I’ll miss you and love you forever my child.